How a Professional Photoshoot Transformed My Self Image
This post is going to be very personal, however, I know somewhere out there someone will benefit from reading this. Weight and self image have always been a struggle for me. I personally know what it feels like to be checked out head to toe from friends and family members whom I haven’t seen for a while, and without any words being spoken, internally knowing their thoughts: “Oh, she’s put on some weight.” Why yes, thank you for bringing my self image insecurities to light and not only making me feel uncomfortable, but also monitoring my food intake while I am around you.
E N O U G H!
Like many others, Covid has been unkind to my weight. Recently, I have noticed it’s always in the back of my mind. Thoughts saying, “Elizabeth you need to lose weight. You shouldn’t weigh this much for your height…” Those vicious voices were loudly speaking to me as I was preparing for a professional photo shoot. Of course, the photos were scheduled a couple days after Easter weekend, and I probably ate more than I should have. Once Tuesday arrived, I was so afraid my weight would ruin my photos. I was doubting myself and my beauty.
When I arrived at my shoot, my photographer, April Ohl, intently listened to my concerns and fears and immediately negated them. Like magic, she naturally created an empowering self-loving environment. My fears and insecurities drowned without oxygen. The sassy Liz my friends and family know me as effortlessly shined. Never in my life have I felt so beautiful. Never in my life have I felt so in love with myself. April captured every spunky moment, and I am forever grateful for that.
I left the shoot with a giddy smile on my face. Drunk and high on self love. I made a declaration to myself that I will never ever feed that degrading voice who judges every bite of ice cream or my recent addiction for carrot cake. I like to think of myself as the modern version of Marilyn Monroe, who, for her time was extremely overweight. Yes, I have cellulite. Yes, I have hips and curves. Yes, my thighs rub together when I walk. Yes, I have junk in the trunk that sometimes requires me to go up a size in pants. Yes, I am busty. These things make me a beautiful curvaceous woman. Never again will I shame or take my womanly figure for granted. Someone give me the keys to the highest building in Pittsburgh please because I’ll declare my self love from the rooftop!
No matter your gender or whatever you identify as, be proud of yourself. Be proud that your version of God created you unlike anyone else. There will never be a another you in this lifetime. Do one thing for yourself and stop listening or following those people who immediately make you insecure. Stop hearing and feeding those voices and watch how fast they fade once you stop feeding them. The loudest form of rebellion is not conforming and falling in line with society’s version of beauty. Join me by showing up unapologetically and authentically you.
My favorite RuPaul quote is “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love someone else?”
Can I get an AMEN?!
P.S: If you are interested in working with April Ohl, check out her website here
